Kindergarten

When it was time to go to kindergarten, Nagymama and Anyu assumed that I knew enough English to get by. That was a big mistake.

Growing up, everyone in my household spoke either Hungarian or Romanian. I was afraid of talking to any adults other than my mother, aunt, and grandmother, and I had never been around any other children aside from my cousins and the kids from the local Hungarian athletic club. I assumed that everyone in the world spoke Hungarian, and the TV language (English) was only used by the people and talking animals that lives inside of the television box.

On the first day of school, Nagymama walked me from our house to park around the corner. I assumed that we were going to play on the swing, but she brought me inside of big building next to the park. We walked down a long corridor and opened a door to a room filled with children running around everywhere. She waived hello to an old lady with short hair and braces that was helping a little girl glue macaroni to a piece of paper. I grabbed onto Nagymama’s legs...
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The Shoe in the Kapu

Back in 1995, while I was trying to beat the hardest video game on the planet, aka, Sega's Ecco the Dolphin, Nagymama walked right in front of the TV to get my attention.

“Hey, watch it!” I screamed, poking my head between her legs to try to avoid the giant squid monster shooting pointy things at me.

“Stephie, come outside, there’s a shoe in dah kapu*.” (*Hungarian for fence)

“What?”

“Dah shoe…it’s in dah kapu.”

“And dah grandma...she’s in dah way. MOOOOOVE!” I protested in the most irritating teenage whine I could conjure.

“No, come outside now. Dere’s a MAN’S shoe in dah kapu.”

She finally forced me outside and pointed to the size 13 Timberland boot sticking out of the fence in the side yard. My mom was already outside inspecting the shoe and ranting about it on the cordless phone to my aunt. Although the scene was a little strange, I really didn’t give a crap because I just wanted to figure out how the heck to beat that stupid squid so I could see...
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