Dah Cat

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"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Vell….It all started with a cat," she said.

"Uh-huh," I mumbled into my cup of tea, knowing that some horrible story was coming.

"So, I started feeding dah cat. It like to eat the Fancy Feast, like the commercial."

"You don't even LIKE animals! I asked if I could have a dog for Christmas, and you told me that if I ever got a dog, it would EAT MY FACE, mom!”

"Oh, no but this is just a cute little cat! He had the DIAMOND eyes!"

"So then why didn't you catch him, take it to the vet, get it some shots, and…keep it?"

"Vhat are you. CRAZY? It's probably full of DISEASE!"

"So, wait…over the last few years, whenever I ask about the random freaking cat food on all our windowsills, you told me that grandma buys it to keep out the robbers. I thought it was some…superstitious….thing.”

“Yeah, she...
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It’s a Dog-Eat-Child Vorld Out Dere

My family has never been too keen on animals, but as a young girl, I loved all critters: horses, fish, puppies, kittens – if it swam, crawled, or galloped, I doodled pictures of it all over my notebook. Unfortunately, even though I am fascinated with the gestation cycles of seahorses and the unusual mating rituals of jumping spiders, when it comes to actually interacting with animals, I’m afraid of everything.

I think some of my irrational fears stem from childhood trauma. When I was in kindergarten, I sprained my ankle on the jungle gym, so I was stuck at home for what seemed like FOREVER. Nagymama said I looked too “pale and horrid”, so one day, they took me outside to get some sun and propped my leg up on our picnic table.

No more than five minutes after I started reading one of my “Berenstain Bears” books, the neighbor’s German Sheppard saw me, jumped over the fence, and ran over. I had never actually pet a dog before, so I was a little cautious but still curious.

Anyu was in the front yard, chatting with Nagymama and vehemently pointing to...
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